Ladies, help us help you. This is the perfect opportunity to tell us guys all the stuff you’ve wanted to say for so long. Give it to us straight.
Don’t be shy, tell us what we should be doing so we have our act together when we meet you. The more you share with us, the better informed our bachelor viewers will be, which is ultimately good for you.
Question for the Gals:
What is (or was, for you married women) your number 1 pet peeve when it comes to guys and dating?
I don’t know if this will be helpful, but I notice my brother (single) is very uptight and finicky when he orders his food. He asks the server about the specifics of certain ingredients in every dish and then orders his food with 5 different specifications!! If I was his date it would drive me crazy.
I sometimes wonder how many men could improve their chances if they were made aware of major “turn offs” when it comes to dating. But I guess that’s the point of your website, right? To help men learn about these things so they can improve their chances.
Mr. Bachelor, you’re obviously very domesticated and women love that! If more guys knew how to cook they would really impress their dates.
Molly – You’re right on the money! Imagine how many more successful dates your brother, or men in general, would have if they knew all the things that “turn off” women. Thanks for your insights! And yes, that’s what this site is all about.
I love a man that can cook. It shows that he is really interested and willing to put forth a lot of effort to make me happy. When he plans the menu and does the shopping too, that’s the best. I don’t even mind if I have to do the dishes.
I think for me the number one thing I look for is an old fashioned “Gentleman”. This usually means he is considerate of his surroundings when he is with me as I am of his. I think it also means he is confident and secure with himself. It can make those other peeves go away.
Thanks for asking!
Heidi – Thanks for sharing!! We need more comments like this.
Women, what do you think of Heidi’s comment?
With internet dating being as popular as it is, many women (myself included) have opted for meeting men online…which inevitibly leads to the (sortof) blind first date. These have the potential for being disasterous, so my advice is thus:
Plan a quick meeting–coffee, for example, or a happy hour after work. Bar-hopping, or “marathon dates” that never seem to end can have the kiss of death…especially when one or both parties involved aren’t really feelin’ it. Do yourselves a favor and arrange for something quick. Keep in mind that you have PLENTY of time to get to know one another…and if the sparks are flying after one cup of coffee, by all means: order another! If they aren’t…well, you’ve got a dog to walk/early morning meeting/invalid grandmother at home.
Thank you for your comment. I think your advice is excellent. I haven’t done any internet dating yet, but if I meet someone for the first time, I suggest meeting again for a cup of coffee wherever it may be convenient for her. Lord knows there’s a cafe at every street corner. That allows each of us to relax and converse without any other pressure or expectation. Like you said, if each feels there’s no need to follow up, it’s no big deal and you go on your way.
I hate it when a guy takes you out to dinner, pays the check and asks me to leave the tip! How cheap!
In my experience, the biggest problem among young men (I’d say 25 and younger – maybe even 30) is that they don’t know what they want, and when they do know, they tip-toe around it. I like when a guy will just ask me out or flirt with me without muddling up the messages. Of course, whenever that happens he’s usually about twenty years my senior.
I’m not sure why it takes twenty years for men to get the confidence to walk up to a woman and tell her he’s attracted to her, but it’d be great if we could find a way to speed up that process. There is nothing more annoying than going home and sorting through all the mix signals I’ve gotten for the day to try to make sense of them.
I know it’s not easy to walk up to a girl and ask her out – believe me, I know. But if she says no, at least he doesn’t have to leave with all the should’ve, could’ve, would’ve’s and he can move on to the next girl. As long as he’s a gentleman and accepts her rejection courteously, it’s highly unlikely she’ll laugh in his face.
Ultimately, I wish more guys were just straight forward and honest, and stopped trying to be so mysterious with what they want. I’m not a detective.
I am with Heidi on the “old fashioned gentleman” thing. There is nothing sexier than when a man treats you like the lady you are(and not a chick, broad, or whatever other word they use) lol.
Also, I don’t like those who treat waiters, ticket takers, valet, etc., like crap. I understand bad service happens sometimes, but throwing a fit, threatening, and complaining loudly about it doesn’t solve anything, and makes a man look like a little boy having a tantrum.